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Free and Funny Cry For Help Ecard: Whoever is in charge of making sure I don't do stupid shit is fired.

for all those bullies.

Better yet get a team of dogs and let them pull you in a wagon.After all, You PULL a wagon.pushing a wagon.well that is just unnecessary work for anyone.

Always there for me...@hollye

I don't often talk shit about people and if I do its usually things I've said to their face but it still would be GREAT to have a friend like this! Who's signing up to be that friend?

Oh dear, this is me. I refuse to retract something that I would readily repeat, even if I regret the consequences of my words.

Your obsession with trying to make people feel sorry for you is only pushing people away. Fix your life already & quit the B.

For my 20 year old son.  Being married is awesome so find a nice girl and stay at the party. You don't have to sacrifice the fun you are having.

Funny Wedding Ecard: Getting married before the age of 25 sounds a lot like leaving a party before 10 PM to me. well-i-thought-it-was-funny

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This is a story about the most powerful paradigm shift of my life. It was a time where I had found considerable career success, but the fut.

Shopping carts should have - at the very least - front bumpers covered in broken shards of glass & cacti for people who aisle-hog. Or maybe just a horn.

I+grocery store and Walmart! Hate going shopping. can't+tell+you+the+number+of+times+I've+fantasized+about+running+my+cart+into+the+heels+of+the+stupid+people+that+block+the+aisles+at+the+grocery+store.

LOL!! Been there done that.

Free and Funny Confession Ecard: That moment when you have so much shit to do, that you decide to take a nap instead.

Funny Friendship Ecard: I just knew we'd be friends forever from the moment I discovered that you also have no filter for your bitchy and sarcastic thoughts. so this explains our friendship to a T

Hoping my New Years Resolution will change my mind...lol

Free and Funny Confession Ecard: I LOVE EXERCISE! Just not as much as I love wine. or my friends. or sitting on my ass. or a combination of any of the above.never mind.

funny pictures - funny quotes - I just ran my first marathon this morning

Just kidding I'm on my cupcake. Just kidding I hate cupcakes. Just kidding I live for cupcakes. Just kidding I live for veggies. Just kidding veggies make me sick. Just kidding millennials make me sick.

Bhahahahaha!! You both are fucking retards! The apple doesn't fall far from the tree :)

Free and Funny Friendship Ecard: I know you're my best friend because I'd shank a bitch for you.

Pathetic gene pool LOL

I look at people sometimes and think… Really? That’s the sperm that won?

Thanks for saying my face looks like I'm ill with no makeup

Today I didn't wear makeup. Four people asked me if I was feeling okay.Thanks for thinking my real face looks like I am physically ill.

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